Many moons ago I met a beautiful soul named Carol. She and I became fast friends, always interested in the same things. We were both staying home with our children and spending some time working on a website competition. One day while talking we decided that we should open our own. We became www.digitaldelilah.com . She, Lady De and I, Lady Lilah set out to have some fun and we did! We met some great people along the way and our lives meshed in a way I feel blessed to say. She always thought of others and especially her family. So, as life would have it some time went by and a series losses (deaths) happened in my life and we shortly after lost DD’s. The place where everything had begun. I can’t explain how much I have regretted that because it was so much more than a website competition. It was a group of women sharing their lives and loves and heartbreaks. For that I will always have regret.
Time passes and loss strikes again and my sweet Husband was killed. Carol had been diagnosed with breast cancer but all was looking well with her. One day the phone rang and it was Carol and she was very intent on asking several very deep and important questions. She wanted to know everything about how I felt after Ronald, my Husband, had died. She wanted to know how the kids were and what kinds of things I did for them and so so many other things. She was preparing. Not for herself but for her family. As we spoke the reality of why she was asking set in. The cancer had come back. I am certain Carol knew she wasn’t going to make it and even as she suffered her one and only concern was her Husband, children and family. All of her questions I answered that day and she seemed to just “get” everything I was saying.
Time passes, as it does...
I remember the call I got from Carol’s husband Steve. He told me she had died. In disbelief, unable to swallow I cried tears that still come even now, just feeling completely gutted. Still do.
Carol, I finally got our DD’s back. I want it to honor you and all that you were and all that you are to me, family, friends and so many others. Everyone's life that you touched. You left us way to soon. People say that but it's true. We all wanted you longer. Those beautiful eyes and that wonderful laugh.
I miss you Lady De. I always will.
“All men have stars, but they are not the same things for different people. For some, who are travelers, the stars are guides. For others they are no more than little lights in the sky. For others, who are scholars, they are problems... But all these stars are silent. You—you alone will have stars as no one else has them... In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars will be laughing when you look at the sky at night... You, only you, will have stars that can laugh! And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me. You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me. And you will sometimes open your window, so, for that pleasure… And your friends will be properly astonished to see you laughing as you look up at the sky! Then you will say to them, ‘Yes, the stars always make me laugh!’"
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
The Little Prince